At one point I turned to Wifey and said: "He has great hair!"
After the show was over I went back to reading 50 Shades of Grey.
Saturday, April 28, 2012
ROAR!
So last night I was watching a show with Rob Lowe (actually it was a show starring Rob Lowe)....I was watching with Wifey.
At one point I turned to Wifey and said: "He has great hair!"
After the show was over I went back to reading 50 Shades of Grey.
At one point I turned to Wifey and said: "He has great hair!"
After the show was over I went back to reading 50 Shades of Grey.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
IHOP
So yesterday I went out for breakfast.
Just a local place, not The International House of Pancakes.
As I ate I thought about The International House of Pancakes.
A house.
Of pancakes.
Think about that for a second.
A house...of PANCAKES!!
An international house.
Of pancakes.
Just a local place, not The International House of Pancakes.
As I ate I thought about The International House of Pancakes.
A house.
Of pancakes.
Think about that for a second.
A house...of PANCAKES!!
An international house.
Of pancakes.
Friday, April 20, 2012
You're hearing this through my grapevine.
This man came in yesterday wearing a nice grey suit.
Good shoes.
Mid-late 50s.
Looked like an insurance guy.
Maybe an accountant.
He looked much older than his years.
Beat down from decades of doing a mundane job.
He bought some comics (for himself? his kids? grandkids?)
I tried a little small talk....nothing.
Shark eyes.
No twinkle at all.
What is this guys life like?
Nagging wife?
Big mortgage?
Crappy kids?
It is Hell, I assume.
Then a Creedence Clearwater song came on the radio.
I Heard It Through The Grapevine.
His eyes came alive.
Just a little.
His finger tapped his thigh.
I noticed.
ME: "I love Creedence!"
HIM: "Me too! I never hear them anymore."
(I thought...Why not? I hear them every day)
ME: "1970 was a great year. Creedence, comic books..."
HIM: "What's that other song he did...I like that. The baseball one."
ME: "Centerfield."
---
Point of the story?
I have no idea. Creedence perked up a day.
Good shoes.
Mid-late 50s.
Looked like an insurance guy.
Maybe an accountant.
He looked much older than his years.
Beat down from decades of doing a mundane job.
He bought some comics (for himself? his kids? grandkids?)
I tried a little small talk....nothing.
Shark eyes.
No twinkle at all.
What is this guys life like?
Nagging wife?
Big mortgage?
Crappy kids?
It is Hell, I assume.
Then a Creedence Clearwater song came on the radio.
I Heard It Through The Grapevine.
His eyes came alive.
Just a little.
His finger tapped his thigh.
I noticed.
ME: "I love Creedence!"
HIM: "Me too! I never hear them anymore."
(I thought...Why not? I hear them every day)
ME: "1970 was a great year. Creedence, comic books..."
HIM: "What's that other song he did...I like that. The baseball one."
ME: "Centerfield."
---
Point of the story?
I have no idea. Creedence perked up a day.
Monday, April 16, 2012
I actually kept my big mouth shut.
A young kid comes into the store.
Looks around.
Comes up to the counter.
Here is the conversation:
KID: "I have a roll of quarters in my pocket."
ME: ::::silence:::
KID: "I'll pay with these dollars."
ME: "Thank you."
Looks around.
Comes up to the counter.
Here is the conversation:
KID: "I have a roll of quarters in my pocket."
ME: ::::silence:::
KID: "I'll pay with these dollars."
ME: "Thank you."
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Shenanigans!
TIME: Around 11:00 pm.
PLACE: Darkened room upstairs.
THE PLAYERS: Me and Wifey. (Or is that Wifey and I?)
SCENARIO: I started clowning around about something.
CONVERSATION THAT FOLLOWED:
WIFEY: "I'm not in the mood for your clowning!"
ME: "Okay."
----
(Wifey was hiding beside the bureau when she told me that)
Monday, April 09, 2012
My trip to the bank
BANK MANAGER TO EVERYONE IN BANK: "Did anybody leave this folder here?"
ME: "Is there any money in it?"
ME: "Is there any money in it?"
Friday, April 06, 2012
Ask Rodney King again!
Dear Rodney King,
I'm thinking of building a house. Should I use wood or brick?
Thank you,
Trayvon
---
Dear Trayvon,
Usually I would say brick, but for you I suggest wood. It looks nicer.
Good luck and have a great life!
Rodney King
I'm thinking of building a house. Should I use wood or brick?
Thank you,
Trayvon
---
Dear Trayvon,
Usually I would say brick, but for you I suggest wood. It looks nicer.
Good luck and have a great life!
Rodney King
