Monday, March 20, 2006



1. Start a blog

2. In the profile section put a picture of just your smoldering dark eyes.

3. Toss in a witty Hitlerism

4. Pretend that you're actually listening to what they're saying (chicks love that!)

5. Open a door or pull out a chair for them once in a while.

6. And thats about it.

Follow those precise instructions and the ladies are yours!
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5 comments:

  1. Sparkle Plenty11:28 AM EST

    1. Girls, eh? Ah, ah, ah, Ah-Ahchoo-SHEMALE! Can't get rid of this cold.
    2. And, we all thought that the expression "smoldering dark eyes" died with Rudolph Valentino. It sounds painful...Dude! Call the fire department! 911!
    3. Funny. Goebbels always said that Hitler was a cock blocker.
    4. Does talking in french help, too, or just for Pepe LePew?
    5. So, you whisk the chair out, they sit on the floor, and you say "Just testing your reflexes, dear?"
    6. Bonus Tip: If you want to pick up an older lady, try dressing like Lawrence Welk and dabbing a dampened coupon behind your ears to produce that tantalizing "bargain musk"!

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  2. Anonymous3:50 PM EST

    I must admit, the "smoldering dark eyes" hooked me.

    Any other body parts you want to share with us? All in the interest of picking up chicks, that it.

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  3. Anonymous3:52 PM EST

    "is." There I go again-I think I'll read before I press the send button from now on.

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  4. Sparkle Plenty4:15 PM EST

    It's a good idea to include a shot of "smoldering dark eyes" when you weigh 432 pounds and need to be flipped with a Bunyanator 5000(TM) spatula to prevent bedsores. At least, that's what Heavy Hansel (sweetcandyhouse.blogspot.com) tells me.

    Yet, I still worry about the inherent fire hazard in smoldering eyes. Don't try this at home, boys. Drop and roll, nooprah, drop and roll.

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  5. Cake1:32 PM EST

    Sounds like Nooprah is well on his way to being a lady's man.

    Cheers!

    ::raises a pint of the best lager to him::

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