So as I mentioned the other day I was out shopping for cars.
I bought one for Wifey and it was going to be delivered to my house on Tuesday.
And while I'm driving home I feel a tinge of jealousy sweeping over me and MY car. Wifey gets a new car...well darn it, so should I.
But I'm practical.
So I opt for a car wash instead.
My thinking is that when I get home her car is gonna be all gleaming and shiny and mine is gonne be Joey Filth.
And the two cars share a garage.
I can't be bringing my dirty car into the garage to meet the shiny new car. The sewer worker doesn't dance with the debutante.
Or something.
So I go and get my car washed. I now feel better about meeting the new lady of the house.
So I get home, drive into the driveway where Wifey is standing with her new shiny car. But mine is shiny also. I feel good.
I get out of the car and instantly notice that my antenna is broken and laying limp like Joe Placebo at the Cialis trials.
(seems I forgot to turn my radio off during said car wash and the antenna stayed up just long enough to get broken)
I have a clean, yet impotent car sitting next to a hottie and no chance of scoring.
PS
Fixing the antenna is going to cost $100. Add the $3.00 car wash fee and the grand total of cleaning my car was $103.00.
If you enjoyed this story please read my June 22, 2006 post.
You betcha I enjoyed this story, but urrrrgh! D'you know how long it took me to find the June 22, 2006 post? I had to crawl on my belly through tunnels of dank-smelling blog archives (you need to tidy up), hitting my head on low-hanging sarcasm, until I finally found your June 22, 2006 post. Actually, no. I ended up at the June 26, 2006 story first (which is a CLASSIC, but...).
ReplyDeleteTo sum up: I left my comment on today's post on your June 22, 2006 post. You will find it there.
"(seems I forgot to turn my radio off during said car wash and the antenna stayed up just long enough to get broken)"
ReplyDeleteSo to sum up:
Yer clean but not so bright.
Sparkle owes me a Coke for commenting at the exact same time.
ReplyDelete(I don't care if we didn't say the same thing, she was probably THINKING what I typed, which is close enough.)
Don't worry about being such a blockhead, we all love you anyways.
ReplyDeleteAt least you got a nice shiny comb out of the deal.
ReplyDeleteWhat?
Oh sorry, wrong story.
I hate crocs too.
ReplyDeleteAnd where is this fantasy land place where a car wash costs only $3? Heh, maybe in 1978.
ReplyDelete"And where is this fantasy land place where a car wash costs only $3?"
ReplyDeleteFollow the first star to the left and straight on till morning!
3 clams a car wash with a minimum purchase of 8 gallons of gas.
ReplyDeleteAnd they use cloth.
Metal antenna bending cloth.
Wow, the American dollar has been so devalued now you're using the bartering system?
ReplyDeleteWhat will you give me for three minnows and a trout?
P. Pan's retarded...everyone knows it's really "Second star to the right, and straight on 'til morning!"
ReplyDeletewhen you're through would you come over and wash my car cos I really am tired and it needs to be shiny too.
ReplyDeleteCome on Tex, you just want to see IANO in his Daisy Dukes getting all soapy now don't you?
ReplyDelete"The sewer worker doesn't dance with the debutante."
ReplyDeletewow. That was so eloquent it was almost poetic.
What kind of outfit were you wearing when you thought of iy?
(First Runner-Up: The Joe Placebo line.)