Pillow Fight!

So for Christmas I asked for a new pillow.

For Christmas I received a new pillow.

That is where the story should end.

It doesn't.

Why doesn't it you ask?

Gather 'round and I'll tell you.

So I get the new pillow and new pillow is excellent for watching tv with. It's firm and it kinda props me up.

So far so good, correct?

But new pillow stays on the couch because that's where I normally watch tv.

So where is old pillow?

Old pillow goes back upstairs on the bed.

'I still see no story here', you think.

So I come home from work yesterday, go upstairs, and notice my old pillow sitting on chair next to bed.

ME: "HEY HONEY!! Why is my pilllow off the bed?"

WIFEY: "It's gross."

ME: "What are you talking about??"

WIFEY: "It's old. It's gross. It's filled with bugs."

ME: "It's not filled with bugs! What makes you even think that??"

WIFEY: "You don't wanna know..."

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So To Sum Up:

In Wifey's Abby Normal brain I've been using a bug-filled pillow for years, she never said anything about it, and now she won't let me put bug-filled pillow on bed, but for some reason it's okay to put a bug-filled pillow on the chair TWO FEET FROM SAID BED.

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TO SUM UP SOME MORE:

My pillow(s) are too big for bugs...bugs would want tiny little pillows for their tiny little bug heads.

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TO SUM UP JUST A BIT MORE:

Wifey=insane

Me=married to the insane.

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SUMMING UP SOME MORE:

There ain't no bugs in either pillow.

Though I do think there are mites on Wifey's side of bed.