I Ain't No Oprah

I've been reading a lot about the black kid and the pinkish/brownish Jewish guy who shot him. I'm trying to see both sides of this s...

As you probably heard, me and The Hoag have formed a band. I came up with BOO. Cake thinks we should be called YOU SUCK. If it's one of ...

So last night on my way home I decided to start a band. So I texted Hoag. ME: "I'm starting a band....do you want to be my singer?...

So last night Wifey and I go out to shop for a painting. We find said painting. Said painting is large. Said painting doesn't fit in my ...

Dear Rodney, How do I avoid trouble when I walk through white neighborhoods? Thank you, Trayvon --- Dear Trayvon, Always use caution when vi...

Have a hoodsie today in honor of Trayvon.

WIFEY: "You make so much noise when you eat cereal!" ME: "It's Capt. Crunch. It's supposed to be noisy." ---- Wi...

Last night I had sausage. Sausage makes me dream about The Monkees and baseball. I was sitting in section #1 of Fenway Park. The worst secti...

Not so funny.

DAUGHTER: "You kmow...Grandpa is the best man in the world." ME: :::eyebrow raised::: DAUGHTER: "After you." ME: "N...

So I have a new crazy guy that comes in the shop. Today he started spouting off on how TV is ruining people and society. Then he said some w...

So I had a long time customer named Brian (I didn't actually 'have' him...he just shopped here) Anyhow... So about 3 years ago h...

So I'm at a party last night and I notice Bill has a new iPhone. We go over apps. He starts showing me his pix. Lots of pictures from wh...

Women only like to be called one thing that begins with the letter B. Them bitches LOVE being called beautiful!