Tuesday, March 28, 2006

It's wicked easy to publish a woman's magazine...



...just make sure you have at least five of these articles in it.

1. Thin thighs in thirty days!

2. Abs,abs,abs!

3. Twenty five cute Christmas craft ideas!

4. How to excite your man....in the bedroom!

5. Twelve easy to make dinners...for $3.00!

6. Atkins or South Beach? The facts.

7. The G-spot...fact or fiction?

8. Lose 20 pounds in two weeks watching TV

9. Hitler: still alive?

10. What men really talk about.

Others?

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11 comments:

  1. Cake10:32 AM EST

    - Three patterns for sexy lingerie you can knit yourself!
    - The perfect wedding, for $100 or less.
    - Oprah's latest book pick and why it will save civilization.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous10:42 AM EST

    Two real headlines from a recent issue of Marie Claire:

    "What Your Shoes Say About You"

    "Drew Barrymore's Amazing African Journey to End Hunger"

    I don't know which I'm more excited about--the fact that my footwear can apparently talk, or that Drew will next solve the troubles in the Middle East. (While wearning nice shoes, of course.)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sparkle Plenty11:55 AM EST

    The 10 Hot New Sex Moves That'll Dazzle Your Guy! (Impossible, they invented everything before 1908.)
    10 Tips to Change Your Life!
    10 Budget-Friendly Banquets!
    WALK your way to fitness! (Which is just a slap in the face to people in wheelchairs.)
    SNACK your way to fitness! (Funny. Never seems to work that way.)
    Winter Wardrobe Wonderland!
    What's new for spring! (Fall! Winter! Summer!)
    Get Your Hubby to Help!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sparkle Plenty11:58 AM EST

    Fast Fixes for Nails (Hair, Skin, Butt, Peace in the Middle East)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sparkle Plenty12:00 PM EST

    Home Makeovers in a Weekend!
    Hitler's At-Home Beauty Spa Tips!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I Ain't No Oprah12:18 PM EST

    That would be pretty cool if Drew Barrymore ended hunger.

    (You do know that I now have to add Drew to my list of pretentious celebrities I can't stand)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sparkle Plenty1:27 PM EST

    If my shoes talk about me behind my back, they're soleless heels that deserve to be trod upon.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Cake3:27 PM EST

    - The girl's guide to auto repair.
    - Swimsuit styles for any body type.
    - Two weeks to a new you!
    - How to make your kids ask for second helpings of brussel sprouts.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous3:30 PM EST

    "...Red Bull, a rubber band and some Crisco"

    That's what Drew Barrymore is using to end world hunger!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sparkle Plenty3:47 PM EST

    I love "fast and easy recipes using red bull, a rubber band, and some crisco!"

    But, gosh, I dunno, Yogi...red bull, a rubber band, and some crisco sounds like a hybrid combo diet/sex tip to me...

    YIKES!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Cake4:50 PM EST

    "...marinate brussel sprouts in chocolate and cover them in caramel..."

    Ohhhh - I feel sick now.

    ReplyDelete