1. Call guys Chief, Buddy, or Pal (though Dude is surprisingly okay)
2. Drive an El Camino
3. Match the color of your socks to the color of your shirt.
4. Stand in front of me at the post office and then buy 1 stamp. Douchebag.
5. Wear capri pants and then bitch about looking fat or short....cuz thats what it does. Douchebag.
6. Walk around with a toothpick hangin' out of your mouth like you're cool or something. You're not. You're a douchebag.
7. Make numbered lists because you're really not sure where to start or end paragraphs.
8. Root for the New York Yankees
9. Tell people that Timothy Dalton was the best James Bond.
10. Have a hand in the death of over 50,000,000 people, try to create a Master Race, and have a stupid mustache. Douchebag.
I guess someone who matched the color of their socks to the color of their capri pants and Yankees jersey would be a real douchebag then, huh.
ReplyDeleteThat would actually be kinda cool.
ReplyDeleteI had no idea that something could be so full of douchebaggery that it crosses over into cool.
ReplyDeleteI learn something new every day.
Yes you do. That is why I am the teacher and you are the (slightly retarded) student.
ReplyDeleteBe a Kennedy, have an enormous mutant-sized head and write a stupid new book with no ideas in it.
ReplyDelete