So I'm getting ready to go to bed last night when this conversation happens:
CrazyInsaneWife: "You know...you look like Walter Matthau"
ME: "WHAT????"
CrazyInsaneWife: "I didn't mean that in a bad way"
The conversation pretty much ended there because I realized I was talking to a totally insane non-rational person. There is no way to tell a man he looks like Walter Matthau in a 'good way'.
It's like me telling the ugliest woman on earth "You know Whoopi...you kinda look like Hillary Clinton"
WHOOPI: "What????!!!!!"
Moral of the story:
Never tell a man he looks like Walter Matthau and never tell a woman she looks like Hillary Clinton. Not even in a good way. There is no good way.
PS:
I look nothing like Walter Matthau. Or Hillary Clinton.
PSS:
Or Whoopi Goldberg
I don't see it at all. I mean, you'd never wear a Mets baseball cap.
ReplyDeleteHillary Clinton looks a little like Walter Matthau, though, don't you think?
ReplyDeleteYeah, if Walter was hideously disfigured...
ReplyDeleteI like everything about Hillary Clinton except for her looks, personality, and everything she stands for.
ReplyDelete(And I'm actually more Lemmon than Hoag...even though he's a bit of a fancy lad)
You've broken my heart. I thought we had something special.
ReplyDeleteHillary is extra clever this afternoon....terribly ugly, but clever.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's because you were wearing women's underpants.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's because you were wearing women's underpants.
ReplyDeleteI knew it was just a misunderstanding.
ReplyDelete{{blows a kiss}}
Scorpios are often misunderstood.
ReplyDelete[but remember, a scorpion's sting can be deadly.)
You looked a little like Whoopie that night in the cheap motel room when you dressed up as a nun and I dressed up as a.....ooops.
ReplyDeleteSorry. Forgot this was a semi-public space.
I wasn't dressed as a nun...I was dressed as a panda. A Catholic Panda. A Catholic Female Panda.
ReplyDeleteOne year, a friend of mine came to a Halloween party as a nun and her husband came as a cardinal*. Somewhere I have a posed picture of them makin' out. Really, really funny.
ReplyDelete*(The religious figure, not the bird...an important distinction.)
Right after Anunomess brings it back on topic you CAKE screw it all up and now have me thinking about the St. Louis Cardinals and now the Red Sox.
ReplyDeleteCrap.
Sorry, Walter.
ReplyDeleteWho's callin the Matthau black?
ReplyDeleteThere is no Hoagy, he made him up.
ReplyDeleteFor Bacon Ace:
ReplyDeleteA cat with bacon taped to it.
Panda's aren't Catholic. I know that for a fact...they're God hating Communists.
ReplyDeleteI think you might have got it right there anunomess. I'm not sure I understood it, but it sounds good.
ReplyDelete(I'm the slow kid...I need processing time)
I love you Cake.
ReplyDeleteNoOprah,
I think you look more line David Byrne. Is that a compliment in any way?