Years ago before cell phones, me and The Hoag went to Las Vegas for a trade show, and every day at meal time the Hoag would ask the manager of the restaurant in the hotel for a phone to be placed on our table.
And like everything in Vegas, they take care of your requests.
So for six days and eighteen meals we had a phone on our table. Almost BatPhone-ish.
But nobody we knew had that phone number or even wanted to call us.
But we had a phone on our table! And we were important.
"But we had a phone on our table! And we were important."
ReplyDeleteCompensating for those three ounces, huh.
FOUR!
ReplyDeleteYou should have had the manager bring you & Hoag two high-priced hookers every day at meal time.
ReplyDeleteThen you could have been Governor.
I was going to comment but I don't really have time...see, I'm expecting an important call on my cell phone any minute now because I'm ever-so-important.
ReplyDeleteReally, I wouldn't lie to you.
I love the whole phone-on-table thing. It's so Sinatra.
ReplyDeleteI miss phones-on-tables. Actually, I miss phone booths. Where are super heroes supposed to change their clothes? Fast food restaurant bathrooms are just not the same. And, what if you have a superhero emergency and the bathroom is occupied? You're jumping up and down outside yelling, "Superhero emergency! Superhero emergency here!" with your cape tucked under your arm.
And you get tasered. By a pimply-faced assistant manager. Named Josh.
So now when you go and you're using your cellphone do you ask the manager to bring the table to you?
ReplyDeleteSounds like you were a pair of "Billy No Mates.
ReplyDeleteHello? If you still had a phone at your table, I'd call and ask why IAINTNO hasn't blogged about the fact that prominent Democrats seem to get a lot more illicit sex than boring old Republicans, except, of course, Larry Craig, who seems enjoy waving those hefty four ounces around in men's bathrooms only. (Of course, that might have something to do with his chubby little wife Jenny making him eat all those frozen diet dinners. But that's another Republican thing. Dems love to eat real food.)
ReplyDeleteSo you might want to consider changing parties. That's what I'd say...if you had a phone at your table.
Dear MotherofGawd,
ReplyDeleteDemocrats get more illicit sex cuz Republicans are too busy counting their money.
PS:
Nice job by the douchebag Democrats yesterday getting rid of the nice tax cuts we had.
Losers.
Hopefully with the added tax revenue the Democrats will get that welfare program back and running to it's former glory. Maybe get some more programs up and running for illegal aliens. Maybe more money for global warming.
Can we donate money to global warming? Cuz I'll do it, just tell me where to send the cheque!
ReplyDeleteWell, where to tell my people to send the cheque. Cuz, see, I'm important enough that I have people. Do you have people? I thought not.
Cake:
ReplyDeleteCome clean, now: Do you even have cheques?
-- Lamont "Exchequer" Cranston
Hey, it's March 14, and I'm posting this at 1:59 pm (and 26 seconds).
ReplyDeleteYou know what that means, right?
This post takes place at 3/14 1:59:26.
*Sulks* Well, Stuck With A Comb would appreciate it.
-- Lamont "Numerology Jokes Are Wasted On The -- Oh, God, It's True: I Have No Life" Cranston
Pie for everyone!
ReplyDeleteAn ex-boyfriend of mine knew pi to the 40th point or something.
ReplyDeleteFortunately he had other redeeming features.
::thinks about making an ounces joke...decides to pass::
For lamont and Cake's ex:
ReplyDeletehttp://tinyurl.com/27rmef
I'm just hungry for pie now. Damn you all, where's my nice slice of warm apple pie and cheddar cheese!
ReplyDeletedada da da da dah HOAG MAN!!!!
ReplyDelete