Last night was buddy nite with me and The Blonde (The Hoag was somewhere in a plane over the US)
We settled into one of our regular haunts.
Soon after I spot a few of my neighborhood gal friends.
So I walk over to their table, say hi, meet a few of their other friends and then back to my table.
And then I call over the bartender and tell him to deliver a nice glass of milk to their table (I have to be careful not to step in my own genius)
So he pours a small glass of milk and puts it on small tray and brings it over with style.
Lame joke, but it gets a smile and a wave.
So me and The Blonde continue with wine and dinner and no Hoag.
And then the bartender appears at my table with a small glass of something.
ME: "What's this?"
BARTENDER: "It's from the gals over at table 1."
ME: "What is it?"
BARTENDER: "This is a Slippery Nipple.... :::smiles:::: and I'm done doing this tonight!"
ME: "Nice."
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SO TO SUM UP:
Nipples Trump Milk
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SIDEBAR #1:
I now have the tune of The Farmer in the Dell stuck in my brain but with the lyric:
The Nipple Trumps The Milk, The Nipple Trumps The Milk, Hi-Ho The Dairy-O The Nipple Trumps the Milk...
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SIDEBAR #2
Thank you to my buddy JH and the movie Roxanne for the paraphrased line :
"I have to be careful not to step in my own genius."
What if the Beatles sang about cocktails?
ReplyDeletePink Lady Madonna
And...
Okay. That didn't take long.
O Bla Di, O Bla Daiquiri?
ReplyDeleteO Bla Di, O Bla Daiquiri?
ReplyDeleteAnd let that be a lesson to you all...playing the Beatles drinking game leads to duplicate posting.
ReplyDelete::hic::
Pink Lady Madonna
ReplyDeleteAnd...
Oh, man! Lois is right!
If I ever start up that X-rated blog I threatened to start several months ago (David'X RantX), I'm going to steal this story and re-tell it with a better ending. Just sayin'.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, thanks SO much for sticking "The Farmer in the Dell" in my brain. Here's one for you: "Hey-la, hey-la, my boyfriend's black!"
Hope I've ruined that song for you all, forever. So there.
Any Mai-Tai at All
ReplyDeleteBallad of Scotch and Water
Good Day Tequila Sunrise
Hey Bullfrog
I Am the (Harvey) Wallbanger
Long Island Ice Tea Sally
Strawberry Daiquiri Forever
The Continuing Story of Boilermaker Bill
::hic::
ReplyDeleteAny Mai-Tai at All
Ballad of Scotch and Water
Good Day Tequila Sunrise
Hey Bullfrog
I Am the (Harvey) Wallbanger
Long Island Ice Tea Sally
Strawberry Daiquiri Forever
The Continuing Story of Boilermaker Bill
Hey-la to you, too, David'Z. But, wait a second. Why would the fact that your boyfriend is black ruin a song for us? Which song would it ruin?
ReplyDeleteGo ahead and scoff, you... you... you scoffing scoffer, you! But verily, I say unto thee, the song "My Boyfriend's Back" shall be ruined for you, forevermore!
ReplyDeleteI've had "The Farmer in the Dell" stuck in my head all afternoon and I was cranky to start with. IANO WILL PAY!
ReplyDelete