I felt like Puching.

For some reason I didn't have a car and needed transportation so I did what every 19 year old did when they needed transportation and wanted to be cool.

I bought a moped. A Puch® brand Moped

Nothing was ever less cool than me riding that Puch moped but it got me to work on time. I have a 'thing' about getting places on time. I'm always on time. Even if I have to ride a Puch moped.

So anyhow...

That summer about 20 of us went down the Cape for a week or two and I left my Puch at my apartment. I was nervous about leaving it inside with the gas fumes and stuff so I locked and chained it to a bush outside.

When I came home Ol' Puchey® was gone. So was the bush. SOMEONE STOLE THE FREAKIN BUSH!!!

About a week later the police called me and told me they found my moped torched and in the woods. They never found the bush.

Moral of the story?
Don't chain your moped to a bush when there are bush thieves around.