My Dinner With Kramer

As you probably know by now Michael 'Kramer' Richards had a bad weekend. I had dinner and conversation with him last night.

Here is how that went:

ME: "So before we begin would you like a smaller or larger steak?"

KRAMER: "Bigger."

ME: "And after dinner would you prefer a cigar or a..."

KRAMER: "Cigger-rette"

ME: "So before you became famous you had lots of odd jobs....I heard you once worked in a cemetery. What did you do there?"

KRAMER: "Digger"

ME: "And you also worked in the fields in Texas looking for black gold....Texas tea....what did you do there?"

KRAMER: "Oil rigger"

ME: "And you went to college...what was your favorite part of that?"

KRAMER: "Keggers"

ME: "Great steaks, huh? Would you like a beer or wine or maybe some...."

KRAMER: 'Ligger"

ME: "So lets get on with this weekend....your old pal Julie-Louis Dreyfus had some harsh words to say about it."

KRAMER: "Frig her"

ME: "You must have read all the stuff on the Internet about you....you do have a computer, correct?"

KRAMER: " 80 Gigger"

ME: "Lets talk a bit about show biz...who is your favorite actress?"

KRAMER: "Renee Zellweger"

ME: "Actor?"

KRAMER: "Arnold Schwarzenegger"

ME: "Any favorite rock stars?"

KRAMER: "Jagger"

ME: "Any favorite or beloved cartoon characters from childhood?

KRAMER: "Tigger"


And that was the gist of my dinner with Kramer. Seemed like a nice man with no issues.