Friday, November 03, 2006

(A wickless) Candle In The Wind

I own a small store that deals in some collectible celebrity stuff. The Beatles, Marilyn Monroe, etc.

The key with collectibles of this nature is that items when the celebrity was alive is usually worth more than the crap that gets made after they die. Or breakup like the Beatles. And collectibles of the star BEFORE they were famous is sometimes worth the most.

Do you understand all of that?

The second thing is I hate making fun of my customers (I love making fun of my customers).

Do you understand that? Good....cuz I'd like to relate a phone call I had yesterday.

::Phone rings::

ME: "Hello...Wicked Cool Collectible Store...How may I help you?"

THE GAL: "Hi...I was wondering if you buy Marilyn Monroe memorabilia"

ME: "We sure do...what do you have?"

THE GAL: "I have a calendar of her"

ME: "Do you know what year it's from?"

THE GAL: "Yes...its real old...it's from 1984."

ME: ::me thinking how NOT old that is when it comes to Marilyn Monroe stuff:: "Ummm...I'm not really looking for that right now. I'm looking for things of Marilyn from when she was alive...pre-1962 stuff"

THE GAL: "I'm pretty sure the pictures in the calendar were taken while she was alive"

ME: "Possibly. Maybe you could try ebay for that. Thank you."

17 comments:

  1. Anonymous11:22 AM EST

    Exactly how small is your store?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh, hey, that reminds me...are you hiring?

    No?

    Can I leave a resume, anyways?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous11:25 AM EST

    Do you sell or buy Goebel or Hummel figurines? How old do they need to be to be valuable?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous11:26 AM EST

    How much would you pay for pictures of Marilyn Monroe taken after she was alive? Would the value of the photos increase based on how long she hadn't been alive?

    -- Lamont Cranston

    ReplyDelete
  5. How about a picture taken before she was born? You know, a shot of her mother's stomach? Surely that'd be worth a fortune!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous11:44 AM EST

    I'm curious, is dust considered a defect on collectibles? I have some Gone With The Wind 8 inch collectors plates (some with the certificates!)that are a little bit dusty. Do you recommend that these be cleaned in some way?

    ReplyDelete
  7. For all collectible questions please call me at ASshole-555-1212.

    Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I think Marylin may be in the new 2007 celebrity zombie calendar. With recent photos.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous12:55 PM EST

    They said this was funny. It's not that funny.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous12:59 PM EST

    Is too!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous1:23 PM EST

    You people are creepy.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous2:11 PM EST

    Do you buy Hillary Clinton collectibles?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous2:43 PM EST

    I have pictures. Call me.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous2:44 PM EST

    Mine are better. Call me.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Anonymous2:49 PM EST

    I killed Marilyn.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Anonymous6:14 PM EST

    How about a calendar with with pictures of different celebrities AFTER they died?

    January: Marilyn Monroe
    February: Princess Diana
    March: James Dean
    April: Elvis

    You get the idea. I KNOW people.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Anonymous10:57 AM EST

    my ex-girlfriend's dad had a picture of marilyn monroe that showed her bush. it was a real picture taken when she was a live (not an autopsy photo) of her getting out of a car (the car wasn't alive either, unlike herbie) and you could see her bush (not george w. who is alive but shouldnt' be).

    ReplyDelete