Monday, December 11, 2006

Kraft Macaroni & Soap

All everyone does is complain about stuff. Nabobs of Negativity.

But nobody every complains about Kraft Macaroni & Cheese and soap. Even if someone HATES Kraft Mac and Cheese they don't complain about it. They deal with it. It's there. It's non offensive. It costs (I assume) under ten bucks.

When you have young kids and you present them with Kraft Macaroni and Cheese they think of you as Emeril Lagasse or something. It's truly a joy giving food. It's easy to make. It's good for you (contains the vitamins macaroni AND cheese) Doesn't take up much room in the cabinets. It's orange. It's Kraft Macaroni and Cheese.

So what does soap have to do with this? I'm talking about a bar of soap that you wash with. Nobody complains about soap. It's smooth. It's soapy. It gets you clean. It costs (I assume) under ten bucks. It's awesome. Oh sure, once in a while it'll slip out of you're hand and you'll curse....but it aint the soap's fault. It's yours.

We as a species also like smooth stuff and soap is nice and smooth.

You know what else is great about a bar of soap? You never run out of it. Each day you SEE the bar getting smaller and know when it's time to get a new one. It's soap. And it is awesome.

So stop yer complaining...we have soap and Kraft Macaroni and Cheese.

27 comments:

  1. Sorry, dude, but I tried it and they taste terrible together.

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  2. But you cleaned your plate...didn't you?

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  3. I cleaned my plate WITH the soap. Does that count?

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  4. You may now purchase (for under 10 bucks) a new version of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese Called Easy Mac.

    I guess some folks had trouble making the old version.

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  5. By the way, those folks are officially known as "Retarded,"
    so it should've been called "Easy Mac For Retards"

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  6. Easy Mac? And it's really under $10?

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  7. Just don't buy the "healthy" version of Kraft Mac & Cheese. I think its whole grain or something dumb like that..I made that mistake in a fit of dementia once. Stuff tastes horrible.

    I learned my lesson. God does not want Kraft Mac & Cheese to be healthy. He/She/It wants it to be yummy.

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  8. I can attest that soap doesn't taste good.......from years of having my mouth washed out by my mom. Guess it didn't work.

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  9. Lois just complained about Kraft Macaroni and Cheese.

    What's next...soap?

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  10. Anonymous12:37 PM EST

    I prefer body wash. It comes in a clear bottle and you still know when you need more and it is also under 10 bucks.

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  11. Whole grain soap sucks too.

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  12. Such a freakin' democrat I can taste it in your crappy Mac and Cheese recipe.

    Motheragawd? More like MotheraCrappyMacNCheese.

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  13. I love chemicals in my food. Does that make me a Republican?

    Oh, nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

    Somebody get me to an Obama rally, quick!

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  14. The Obama rally is serving yellow whole grain Mac and Cheese...you really want part of that?

    Reagan invented Kraft Macaroni and Cheese...you know, just for the record.

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  15. How'd he have time to do that while he was ending the Cold War?!

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  16. So MothahGawd
    you want to share your homestyle recipe of Mac N Cheese?

    I still don't like the taste of soap

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  17. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  18. Anonymous3:57 PM EST

    Soap is for suckers.

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  19. Motheragwad,

    Didn't you KNOW that was going to get you in trouble?

    Here are the facts according to Dr.IANO:

    Reagan invented Kraft Macaroni & Cheese so he could have enough energy to personally tear down the Berlin Wall and aferwards, because of all the work he did he was little sweaty so he invented soap.

    Did I get that right?

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  20. Except for a missing letter or two.

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  21. I just realized how clearly that was me.

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  22. I was just about to point that out...retahd.

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  23. Dammit... I hate it when I completely agree with NoOprah. I'm perfectly happy when I SLIGHTLY agree with him. But I'm full throttle all about Kraft Mac n Cheese, and Soap (preferrably in bar form).

    If you go into a lav, and there is a bar of soap, you have no reason to complain (about the soap).

    If you go over someone else house, and they offer you Mac n Cheese, you do not ask what kind it is, you simply say "thank you" and commence with the gorging of comfort food.

    Any complaints about either, and you gotta get that silver spoon outta yer butt.

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  24. Hey!

    I'm not a bitch.

    Just a Ho.

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  25. Anonymous5:23 PM EST

    Ho ho ho?

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  26. Anunomess,

    Can't help myself. It's part of my "condition."

    But at least I only bitch at MYSELF about it (another symptom of my "condition").

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  27. And Anunomess,

    I'd rather hang myself with soap on a rope than eat seaweed. In any form.

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