Everybody has stress.
In the last few months I've had a lot. Moving my business is WAY stressful and I thought it was finally done.
But then the building next door was getting a new tenant and the construction began.
Sawing and hammering. Smells of paint and polyurethene. Glass guys. Trash guys. Radios blaring. Phone guys, floor sanders, lighting guys. The air conditioning guys on the roof. Pounding. Hammering. Sawing. Jackhammers outside for water mains. Non english speaking yammering. Yelling. Breaking. Dumpsters filling.
Dry wall guys, painters. On andf on.
Every day for the past two months the noise level next door got unbearable. Electric and gas company guys in MY basement. Pounding and talking and yammering away. NOISE NOISE NOISE. Driving me nuts.
And finally the work was finished. My life was just about back to normal. It was peaceful again. Quiet.
And then on Tuesday it happened.
The RCN van pulled up with the words FREE ICE CREAM emblazoned on the side of the truck. And the truck started playing the 'It's a small world" jingle over and over and over again. for hours the fucking van sat in front of my store blaring out "It's a small world after-all, It's a small world after.....all"
They gave out free ice cream in front of my store for hours and hours with that godforsaken song wafting out of it's crap sound system.
Though it had nothing whatsoever to do with the guys moving in next door I blame them.
It's a small NOISY world afterall.
And I didn't even get a free ice cream.
What kind of an old fart has anything bad to say about free ice cream? Go get a bomb pop ya grinch.
ReplyDeleteI didn't get the free ice cream.
ReplyDeleteYou think if I had free ice cream we'd be talking about stress?
So, there was a van outside your store for HOURS. The van had a big sign saying "Free Ice Cream". You actually watched multiple people approach the van and walk away with free ice cream. None of the people died in front of your or came in talking about how the ice cream was rat flavored.
ReplyDeleteAnd you somehow did not get any of this free ice cream?
Were you mugged by a switch-comb wielding Hoagey?
"Free Ice Cream" also meant I'd have to listen to a RCN sales pitch.
ReplyDeleteI hate RCN more than loud noise and bad jingles.
How many ice cream cones could Joey Chestnut eat in 10 minutes, I wonder?
ReplyDeletep.s.
ReplyDeleteI'm also quite disappointed in your inability to get the free ice cream. For the record.
Joey Chestnut could eat all of the free ice cream.
ReplyDeleteHe's Joey Chestnut.
Eat Me!
ReplyDeleteIce Cream records:
ReplyDelete1 gallon, 9 ounces of vanilla ice cream
12 minutes
Cookie Jarvis
1.75 Gallons Brooklyn Vanilla Ice Cream
8 minutes/May 26, 2006
Patrick Bertoletti
And for those of you who must have cake (birthday cake not the blogger) with your ice cream:
Five Pounds
11 Minutes, 26 Seconds/ May 10, 2005
Richard LeFevre
I once ate a 32" plasma television.
ReplyDeleteYeah? Well I once ate 17 jarts.
ReplyDelete"And for those of you who must have cake (birthday cake not the blogger)"
ReplyDeleteThanks for clarifying...too many bad jokes just sitting there, waiting to be made. Heh.
Ah. You see, you didn't specify that the ice cream was not actually free. It just didn't require any money.
ReplyDeleteRCN, Loud Noises, and Bad Jingles would send me away from the free ice cream right into a Friendly's. After that, I think I would be happy to buy some ice cream, just for the quiet of it.
(Free Ice Cream said Eat Me!....That's awesome)
lick me
ReplyDeleteLet them eat cake!
ReplyDelete"Widescreen mcdawson said...
ReplyDeleteI once ate a 32" plasma television."
Big mouth.
"None of the people died in front of your or came in talking about how the ice cream was rat flavored."
ReplyDeleteI'm beginning to feel unwelcome around here.
Eat ME!
ReplyDeleteFree ice cream made me who I am today.
ReplyDeleteHeavy Helen is hot. I like a woman who can keep up with me in the eating department. Hubba, hubba!
ReplyDelete*sniff*
ReplyDelete