The #1 problem facing America today.

The economy?

I think not...all of us are working (except for two well known retired lounge lizards)

The War?

Are you getting shot at? No.

Is a loved one over in Iraq? I doubt it.

The war shouldn't concern you....so shut up about it.

Maybe the number one problem is world hunger? I'm guessing the last time you were hungry was less than an hour ago and what did you do... starve? I think not. You ate something. World hunger is a media driven made up story.

Health care?

That's a problem?? Why? You have health care so shut up about it. It ain't a problem.

Global warming? Oh PUH-LEASE!

So what's the number problem in America?

I'll tell you in the next paragraph.

The number one problem is when you've just had your car washed and you're toolin' down the highway (pretty cool how I just said 'toolin' down the highway' huh?) and the douchebag in front of you decides that NOW is the time to clean his windshield and his windshield washer sprays up and over his car and all over your freshly washed car causing spotting and stuff.

That's a good enough reason for war. Or to make him starve to death. Or beat him until he needs health care.

Or something.

So to sum up:

Don't be washing your windshield when I'm behind you. Ya got that, Chief?