I Ain't No Oprah

So years and years and years ago I 'fell in love' with this gal. I'll call her Mary. Couple of 'dates' and that was abou...

a) You gots to skin a lot of beaver to huckleup that berrytree. b) Shank it thick, slice it hard, that bacon is gonna fry for a while. c) M...

A wisp of gray Combed gently across A flap of jowl Loosely it hangs Melanoma scars Cranky and mean Half hearted raise of the arm Old coot, o...

The following was on abcnews.com Thursday Sept. 25th. //////ABC News' Teddy Davis Reports: Florida Democratic Congressman Alcee Hastings...

I submit to you, MY PLAN: MY PLAN (Mein Planz) 6:30 pm--Shutter down business. 6:34 pm--Fuel stop. (check wiper blades) 6:40 pm--Travel west...

We finally have the perfect definition for BugFuck Crazy. {{{{{{{{{VERMONT -- People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter to B...

There is a ritual in the morning at my house. Wifey gets up, showers, makes lunches, and whatever else she does downstairs while I sleep. Bu...

In the news today is a story about a 77 year old Brazilian woman that was once John McCain's lover when he was in his twenties. Here is ...

Or something.

1) Howie Mandel=not funny 2) Did Christina Applegate lose weight? Her boobs look smaller. Or something. 3) The opening ten minutes were pain...

GOP candidate Sen. John McCain called the attack "an outrageous act of violence." Sen. Obama said something else.

We all know someone that has hit the lowest of lows. The Horse Addict. Joey Meth Cancer Boy Home Burns Down Man Uncle Loses Another Job Capt...

It's hard to believe that seven years have gone by since it was eight days past 9/11 and we got back to normal. Remember watching that s...

--------------- CINDY McCAIN: "Hey Johnny...could you get me that platter that's in the cabinet over the fridge?" JOHNNY MAC: ...

Did you know he wants to force every woman in America to have an abortion? Huh? Didja? Well, I think it's absurd. I think a woman has a ...

RETARDED KID: "Gum!" OBAMA: "We must CHANGE the way we chew GUM! Yes we can!" RETARDED KID: "Gum!" OBAMA: ...

You died today (or yesterday,...I didn't really read much of the story) I'm guessing you were pretty creative and talented. I'm ...

We all laugh at the side effects that drug companies warn us about when they advertise their products on TV. Don't we? It's almost a...