ME: "We should make a romantic comedy."
WIFEY: "Do you mind taking the DVD out of my ass?"
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WIFEY: "You're annoying."
ME: "I'm not annoying."
WIFEY: "Yes you are...you're annoying."
ME: "How do you figure?"
WIFEY: "You annoy me."
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ME TO GUY AT PARTY: "Do you know any good roofers?"
GUY AT PARTY: "I know good people. I know roofers. I don't know any good roofers."
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ME: "Look at this new romantic app I got just for us"
(shows Wifey cracklin' fire app)
WIFEY: ::rolls eyes::
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ME: "So let me get this straight...you have an i-phone but you don't want to use the i-pod feature on it or any apps??"
MADDOG: "Correct."
ME: "So why did you even bother getting the i-Phone?
MADDOG: "For the phone."
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THE FLASHDANCE GUY: "Are you watching The Winter Classic?"
ME: "I'm at work."
THE FLASHDANCE GUY: "Oh, I thought you might have had the day off and were watching The Winter Classic."
ME: "But you called me at the store."
THE FLASHDANCE GUY: "I thought you might be at home."
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MY LISTING ON EBAY: "Will only ship within the USA"
GUY FROM DENMARK: "Can you ship it to Denmark?"
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CIRCLE JERK GUY: "Hey, Bud!"
ME: "Hey."
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HOAGY: "Why don't you come in tonight and say hello to my wife."
ME: "Okay...why?"
HOAGY: "She said you never come in anymore."
ME: "So she wants me to come in?"
HOAGY: "She didn't really say that...she just commented on the fact that you don't come in anymore. Maybe she likes that you don't come in anymore."
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ME: "So, do you know about the trip out west or is it a surprise from Hoag?"
HOAG'S WIFE: "What trip out west?"
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8 comments:
So to sum up:
You're annoying and people are always mad at you.
p.s.
I got the fireplace app thingy too...it's useless for marshmallows, in case you wondered.
Maddog just calls people and makes fireplace sounds.
Did Maddog get hit on the head at some point by any chance?
Just curious.
There is an app for hitting him over the head.
I got the fireplace app too....my husband's reaction? "You amuse yourself, don't you?"
They also have a fireworks app.
And a glow stick one.
Maybe you can get a good roofer app?
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