I Ain't No Oprah

So I'm down at the Ku Klux Klan Korner Kandy Shoppe and here is what I see on the shelves: 1. Chunky 'Ho 2. Bit O' Guinea 3. Mas...

A story in the paper (online) tells about 20 headless bodies found in Baghdad. Which of course raises some questions: 1. Why were these head...

...and it's starting to scare me.

If you don't know what the Esplanade is....google it. It's in the Boston area. So anyhow, it seems there was some kinda attack on a ...

Well, it seems my premonition was spot on.

I have a premonition. Liz Claiborne (the fashion icon )will die this week.

So last night buddy nite is winding down and the waiter brings the dessert for me, The Blonde, and the Hoag. Some kinda chocolate thing with...

Do I know she loves me more even though she talks to my wife more? Nope. Do I know she loves me more even though she cuddles with my wife mo...

So the big news the other day was that Wal-Mart wants to change their image from a hillbilly department store to a different kind of hillbil...

When in doubt, use the tired 'if the Beatles sang about' premise. 1. Lucy in the Sky with Hexagons 2. Hexagon Shexagon 3. I am the H...

So I'm in the supermarket (are they still called supermarkets?) and I'm strolling (do people still stroll?) through the cereal aisle...

Esquire magazine does a feature every month where a celebrity lists Things They've Learned. I'm gonna do mine. I think I'll make...

Okay so I've come up with a catchy title for today's blog. Now I have to put my money where my mouth is (under my nose) and figure o...

He died the other day. I never heard of him before. He was the cousin of a close friend of mine and I know that he was a great guy. How do I...

...who would you vote for? 1) Wally Cox 2) Charlie Weaver 3) Charles Nelson Reilly 4) Paul Lynne 5) Joan Rivers 6) Hillary Clinton 7. Jimmie...

a) 32% of all Jews skip breakfast. b) 60% of all breakfast restaurants exclude Jews. c) 44% of all West Germans have never skipped to work....

ME: "Puppy!" PUP: :wags tail: ME: "g-owd-zide?" PUP: :wags tail: ME "g-owd-zide? g-owd-zide? g-owd-zide?" PUP...

I hate to just copy and paste a news story into the blog but this just cracked me up. Notice the defense attorneys name. Seems fitting. I ho...

My pastor was sick and ask me to fill in for him. He also asked me to do it in the numbered list format that is so popular in forward thinki...

S_C K S_METH_NG.