I Ain't No Oprah

If you take the first two Lord of the Rings books and the Led Zepplin song Misty Mountain Hop, and then read every fifth word starting from ...

1. The White House 2. Waterfall 3. Orange (the fruit...I mean they weren't even trying when they named this) 4. Jump rope 5. The Band 6....

...just make sure you have at least five of these articles in it. 1. Thin thighs in thirty days! 2. Abs,abs,abs! 3. Twenty five cute Christm...

In between my middleweight boxing career and my part time lumberjack job I sometimes watch a talent show thingy called American Idol. On it...

1. Heeeeeeeey!..................(The Fonz) 2. Hey Hey Hey!...............(Fat Albert) 3. hey HEY hey...............(Rerun from Whats Happeni...

Remember that episode of Seinfeld when George revealed his 'porno' name was Buck Naked? Well, today we're gonna do something sim...

1. Thou shall not pull up to a McDonalds drive-thru window with a mini-van filled with screaming kids with no idea what they want to order a...

1. Stop. 2. Kissing. 3. DaVinci.

1. Allman Joy 2. Alice Goobers 3. KinksKat bar 4. Ted Nougat 5. Dick Clark Five bar 6. O'Henry Rollins bar 7. Mike and Ike (&Tina Tu...

1. I don't believe in hydroplaning (I mean come on now, a 5000 pound car travelling on a film of water....yeah maybe if Jesus was drivi...

1. Start a blog 2. In the profile section put a picture of just your smoldering dark eyes. 3. Toss in a witty Hitlerism 4. Pretend that you...

1. Anything from the Dirt Devil® family of fine products. 2. Slim Fast gift basket 3. Framed picture of Grandpa Munster 4. Anything from Hic...

1. Steamboat Willie 2. Beauty & the Beast 3. Lady & the Tramp 4. 101 Dalmatians (Walt, you sick bastard!) 5. The Love Bug 6. Herbie ...

1. Hitler at Riverdale High 2. Al Cappuccino and other celebrity Starbucks treats 3. Find a trusted auto mechanic to babysit your newborn. 4...

Just scanning a newspapers headlines and you know right off the bat that the story is gonna be horrible. Certain words or phrases are just N...

If you're like me you've often wonder what it would be like if cows could sing...here they are singin' a bit of Hey Jude by the ...

If you're like me you think of all things Irish and especially what their candy and junk food must be like: 1. O' Mallo Cup 2. Reese...

If you're like me you think a lot about proverbs (and Hitler) and how tons of them barely make any sense. Joining two of them together d...

If you're like me you probably spend a lot of time wondering just how great it would have been if the Three Stooges wrote the classics.....