Wednesday, June 10, 2009

The burglar.

I've been in business for three decades and have been broken into a few times.

What they call 'smash and grabs'. They just break a window, grab some stuff, and vamoose.

So this morning I get in the shop to set it up for New Comics Day and it's very quiet in here (as it should be)

And then I hear a noise.

Maybe it's my buddy Clinky playing a trick on me (he has keys to the store)

So I stay quiet and listen.

I hear some more noise.

It ain't Clinky. There is someone I don't know in here with me.

I think I should call out "Hey! Who is here." or something equally clever.

Or maybe I should stay quiet.

Maybe I could call the police...but he'll hear me.

Not sure what to do.

I hear some more noise from down back.

And some more.

Maybe it's just a rat or cat or bird or something.

Or a burglar with a blackjack.

I decide to man-up and head towards the back of the store. Alone. In the dark. With a stapler in my hand (why a stapler I have no idea)

As I walk back there I hear some more noise...some more. Some more.

My heart races a bit.

I get to the back and see the burglar face to face...

It was a stack of comics that fell off the rack.

And not just any kind of comics...but Spider-Man comics. And we all know how a burglar played into THAT mythos.

The above story is true. It happened just a little while ago.

Though I did lie about having a stapler in my hand.

Comics fell off my racks.


Cake said...

My hero!

Flash Thompson said...


Cousin Saul said...

So...I'm in North Carolina watching the local news...and my version of Wifey gives me an evil look when I snicker at the story about the explosion at the Slim Jim factory. I guess it's not really funny cuz two people died...I must really be a JERKy.

Kathy said...

Slim Jim Factory explodes.
Spiderman comics fall off rack.
What next?

These things do come in threes

I Ain't No Oprah said...

There are worse ways to die than to die surrounded by smoked and processed meat in a handy snack size.

I'm just sayin'...

Psychics R Us said...

One of the last remaining Golden Girls is gonna die. Mark my words.

Sparkle Plenty said...

The burglar was cleverly disguised as a comic book rack.

Look at the rack.

See it over there? Close to the door now, edging its way out, filled with Golden Age comic books?

Sparkle Plenty said...

Charlie Chan says: Explosion at factory make Slim Jim contents more suspect than usual.

mulderjoe said...

you can just rock me to sleep tonight with that scary story, thank you very much.

Doctor Gay said...

IANO is gonna rock Joe to sleep tonight?

Lois Lane said...

With many comics comes great responsibility.

Sparkle Plenty said...

Doctor Ben Gay?