I was taking a break from helping Mitt Romney move some stuff when I read this story:
It seems God talked direct to Pat Robertson (crazed TV religious nut job 700 Club guy) and told him that the US was going to suffer a terrible terrorist attack sometime after September resulting in the death of millions.
He also mentions that God didn't say it would be nuclear....but Pat thinks it will be.
So now lets analyze this. A couple things:
I find it odd that God has a calendar and mentions it will happen after September. Is it a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Calendar? Maybe one of those Far Side ones? What kinda calendar does God have? Did he get it AFTER Christmas and save 50%?
I also love that Pat knows it will be nuclear but God doesn't.
Later in the story the reporter mentions Pat's 'predictions' and other conversations that Pat has had with God. Seems last year God told Pat that there would be a tsunami in New England. When questioned Pat said: "Well, maybe there wasn't a tsunami but it rained a lot last year so I was close enough"
No, you weren't.
God spoke to me also.
He told me Pat is a douchebag.
He also told me that new show 'The Knights of Prosperity' is pretty funny.
He was right on both counts.