So Cousin Saul is in a store a few months back and sees this woman with a helium-filled mylar balloon with the proclamation in bright letters emblazoned across it that said something like: WORLD'S GREATEST HUSBAND (or something as equally stupid)
So Cousin Saul approaches her and says (I'm paraphrasing):
SAUL: "Hello ma'am, you do know that NO man on Planet Earth likes getting a helium filled mylar balloon for ANY occasion. EVER."
We also don't like calendars, stuffed animals, 'joke gifts', plants, and other crap you think we'll like.
We DO like: movie passes, gift cards, money, ballgame tickets, t-shirts (NO writing on them) and laser pointers.