It's actually called The Politics Game.
And today is Super Tuesday in (the real) America and voters in about 20 states cast their ballots for their choices.
So spin the spinner and move around the board.
1. Land on Cankles....stab you eyes out. (cankles are that unknown region on Hillary where the ankle ends and the calf begins....it's hard to spot as it just looks like one weird stovepipe)
2. Land on Ronald Reagan...enjoy 8 years of peace and prosperity!
3. Land on Hillary....QUICK! get up before the stank seeps in!
4. Land on Obama...feel good about yourself for a few months and then realize he probably won't get much done.
5. Land on Romney...get a spiffy haircut.
6. Land on McCann...high five everyone around you...except McCann....seems his arm doesn't go up because of the 'torture' he received in Vietnam. Or something.
7. Land on Jimmy Carter...be ineffective for the rest of the game.
8. Land on JFK...bang some hot broads.
9. Land on Bill Clinton...bang some ugly broads.
10. Land on Hillary Clinton again....stab your eyes out!
11. Land on Bob Dole....is he even still alive? Lose tightly gripped pencil.
12. Land on George W. Bush....is he even still alive? Stab your eyes out.
13. Land on something called a Huckabee...move to the next space.
14. Land on Health Care....mock the Clinton's failed health care plan. Stab eyes out.
15. Land on Teddy Kennedy...stab your eyes out.
16. Land on Rudy G....he's America's Mayor! Milk 9/11 for all it's worth.
17. Land on John Kerry....stab eyes out. Once more. Gouge 'em good. Make sure they're out of your skull. Must not take chance of seeing his ugly mug EVER again. Stab eyes one more time. Twice. STABSTABSTAB!
18. Land on Al Gore...ohhhh....he's gotten chubby! Lose meal allowance. Stab eyes out before they heat up the planet.
19. Land on Al Sharpton....stab out Whitey's eyes.
20. Land on Jesse Jackson....ask him how Tito is. Stab eyes out.
21. Land on Adolf Hitler....start thousand year reich. Make it last 12 years. Kill jews, pat puppies. Shoot eyes out in bunker.
And how does one win this game?
Vote the way I'm voting. That's how.
So to sum up:
ABC....Anyone But Hillary. It's my mantra. It should be yours.
(Shake and Bake. El Diablo)