Thursday, March 19, 2009

Jiffy Lube Weasels

The oil change.

Oh, how we all dread it.

It weighs us down.

We know what is coming.

The horror.

We put it off for a few days and then finally just go take our lumps.

This time will be different you think.

They'll just change my oil for the price posted and you'll be on your merry way.

But it never happens.

Your air filter is dirty.

A bulb is out.

The upgraded oil is suggested.

New wiper blades?

Need your tires rotated?

And on and on it goes.

"I don't have enough money today...maybe next time. Thank you!"

You pay and drive away. And for 5 or 10 minutes you actually worry that maybe you should have had Jiffy Lube rotate your tires.

Or something.

And the negative fades to black...and you're relaxed.

Your oil has been changed.

You don't have to deal with these weasels for another 7000 miles or so (they suggest every 3000 miles, your owners manual on your car most likely suggests every 7500 miles)


"Would you like a copy of Watchmen with your comic purchase today?"


A lurking reader said...

"maybe you should have had Jiffy Lube rotate your tires."


Cake said...

So to sum up:

Not having a car is the best superpower!

beatles said...


Maverick Randomness said...

It never fails everytime I take my car in for an oil changed something terrible goes wrong. I know their effing with my car because I didn't upgrade the oil.
It's a '95 corolla and you don't have magic oil it's going to die eventually just leave it be.

Horroru said...

The local mechanic who fixes my car also changes the oil --$24.95 and no pimply faced kid telling me I need to "flush my engine", "change my steering column" or "steamclean my hubcaps."

Lois Lane said...

Are we supposed to buy new copies of Watchmen every 6,000 miles too?

bacon ace said...

Actually Lois. In the last 18 months I have.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Everytime you change the oil in your car you should get a new copy of Watchmen.

And change the batteries in your smoke detectors.

Cake said...

All this talk of oil is making me hungry...I think I'll have french fries with supper.

I hate the effing beatles game said...

Get Black

Hey Lube

Eleanor OilRigby

Oil Things Must Pass

When I'm 10/30

maddog said...

Jiffy Lube is also the reference term for the Silk Spectre in Rorschach’s journal.

Lois Lane said...

Ha! Maddog wins my vote for comment of the day.

Cake said...


Trixie Boyardeeno said...

This is absolutely correct! Chopsocky Portmanteau (aka Maddog) rocked the house.