Wednesday, July 22, 2009

The Emasculation Proclamation


Yesterday. 7:59 pm

All man.

8:00 pm---all man.

8:01 pm---all man.

8:02 pm---turtlin' up.

8:33 pm---make-up being applied.

8:49 pm---dress being fitted.

9:03pm---nails being polished and buffed (do broads have nails buffed?)

9:11pm---hair being highlighted...looking through Talbots catalog.

9:14 pm---noticing curtains and my muffin tops.

9:25 pm---actually rationalizing wearing this cute pair of capris!

9:27 pm---feeling my breasts for possible lumps. Or something.

9:45pm-tapping my toes...smiling....

9:46 pm---credits start to roll.

9:51pm....Wifey goes up to bed. to the History out Nazis.

10:02pm---manhood comes back to life.

10:04pm---vagina is gone.



I watched MAMMA MIA last night.

And liked it.

That my friends is MY Waterloo.


Cake said...

If the manhood is back, how do you explain those little diamond earrings you're still wearing?

And the heels?

Lois Lane said...

IANO's an action transvestite!

No, wait. He stands behind a store counter all day.

IANO's a retail transvestite!

Kathy said...

I'm so embarrassed for you. Tonight I'll watch The Dark Knight and think of you and send some mental-machismo your way.

(do you want to borrow Joe's copy of Miss Congeniality?)

NTTAWWT said...

"Tonight I'll watch The Dark Knight and think of you and send some mental-machismo your way."

It's gonna take more than that to ungirlify him...better fix something with some tools, drink a beer, and grunt a little, too.

I can't believe nobody said this said...

IANO is a dancing queen, pass it on.

Just sayin' said...

"cute capris"

No, I think THAT'S your Waterloo.

Just sayin'. said...

I see what you did...wuss.