Monday, May 22, 2006

26 REASONS WHY GEORGE W. BUSH IS THE BEST PRESIDENT OF THE 21st CENTURY

1. He's a great clearer of brush.

2. He's nice to his mom.

3. Hot daughters

4. Never wears white past Veterans Day.

5. Beat Saddamn at arm wrestling.

6. Is building a big fence or something.

7. Tax breaks

8. Is pretty nice to dogs.

9. Doesn't wear capri pants like a certain J*hn K*rry probably does.

10. He puts the 'rep' in republican.

11. And the 'pub'

12. And the 'can'

13. He invented the beta max.

14. Ummmmm...ahhh. Salt n' Pepa hair.

15. Has 'My Sharona' on his ipod.

16. Saved Afgan rugs from the Taliban.

17. Is NOT a damn dirty ape like a certain A* G*re.

18. I said 26? Why did I say 26???

19. Nothing for #19

20. Sent in troops to IRAQ to remove roadside bombs...they seem to be getting most of them.

21. Stood on World Trade Center rubble with a bullhorn...how fucking cool was that??

22. Said cool patriotic stuff on said mound of rubble.

23. Organized cool concerts post 9/11...Bruce, Stones, the Who, etc...almost worth knocking a few buildings down for, huh?

24. He hired Donald Rumsfeld.

25. Building that fence to keep Canadians out.

26. He reads my blog. And Clinky's.

15 comments:

Cake said...

1. Anyone can operate a lighter.
2. I heard she keeps "walking into doors."
3. They're actually sons.
4. Cream doesn't count?
5. Saddam's arm slipped off the table.
6. Is it white and picket? Hmm.
7. Nothing for #7.
8. He kicks 'em when no one's looking.
9. Only cuz he doesn't want to look short and fat.
10- 12. Who puts in the "li"?
13. And it went belly-up. Hmmm.
14. Isn't that a bad dance band?
15. Oh dear.
16. What about the Afghan ones?
17. I love when you fake swear.
18. This is taking forever!
19. Nothing for this #19 either.
20. ::boom::
21. Would've been better if there'd been an actual bull there, too.
22. I went to the bathroom and missed that. Damn.
23. Oh dear.
24. Oh dear.
25. Damn Canucks, stealing our jobs.
26. Oh dear.

moe berg said...

27. fat in the lap. (please don't ask how i know.)

Cake said...

mb:

How do you know?

Sincerely,
Cake

Clinky said...

28. Never "Put a hat on her" in the Oval Office.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Dear Gazongalicious,

I put the Twinkie Cake pic up but I received numerous (2) complaints that it didn't show up.

It was in some odd format that some browsers couldn't view.

Anonymous said...

Those aren't pillows!

Anonymous said...

#26? I wasn't aware he could read.

Anonymous said...

#26? I wasn't aware he could read.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

He likes the Hitler pictures.

Anonymous said...

He's my Godfather, which makes him pretty damn cool.

Cake said...

I just noticed you listed the fence twice (#6 and #25). I guess you could only come up with 25 reasons, huh.

Somewhere, Bush's heart is breaking.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Two fences retard. One to keep out Mexicans, one to keep Canadians out.

Leonard said...

Great humor and sarcasm -- I love it! Best 26 reasons I know of.

Cake said...

What if he puts the wrong fence on the wrong border? How funny would that be?

Roger the Shrubber said...

Gee, I hope Bush doesn't miscalculate and put the fence right through Massachusetts or something