Monday, May 08, 2006

The Junk Food Pyramid

These are the basic junk foods your body needs on a weekly basis to survive.

Trust me. I'm a doctor.

1. McDonalds Hash Browns (No sane person on earth could dislike these....and they're good for you!)

2. McDonalds Hot Apple Pie (OH. MY. GOD. I love you McDonalds hot apple pie...marry me?)

3. The Jack in the Box taco. I miss you.

4. The McDonalds thick chocolate shake. (Pure thick goodness and great for heart attack victims)

5. McDonalds French Fries (No other fry even comes close to these potato elixir sticks)

6. The Milky Way candy bar. Eat one and tell me you don't like it. A smack upside the head will follow

7. Sweettarts.

8. Hostess Cup Cakes. They'll add at least 4 years to your life. I'm guessing.

9. Bacon....'nuff said.

10. Ice cold Coca Cola from a can...yup, a can. It's fashionable to say it tastes better from a bottle, but it doesn't.

And that my friends is the Junk Food Pyramid....feel free to campaign for your favs.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Try Crows

Clinky said...

Elvis eats boats.

Anonymous said...

I like milk bones.

Cake said...

Anything deep-fried. Anything. Bonus points if it's been rolled in batter first. Yum.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

I just made the phone call home and put in the request for corndogs for dinner.

I was told they're not good for me.

Yeah, right.

Cake said...

Not good for you!? Inconceivable!

Lois Lane said...

Yodels, washed down with Diet Coke with Lime.

No, wait. *Deep fried* Yodels, washed down with Diet Coke with Lime.

Mmmmm. Lime.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

You must read today's edition of FATHER KNOWS SHIT...just click the link over on the right hand side.

That guy is brilliant and if someone doesn't sign him to a publishing deal...well,I guess he won't have a publishing deal.

(He mentions corndogs on the same day we do...and shows a picture of something that I'll be trying by the end of the week....::hinthint::it's made by Jimmy Dean so you know it's good.

Cake said...

::speechless::

Cake said...

Okay, I'm better now.

Let us know how that thing-on-a-stick works out for you. If there's a stomach pumping involved, be sure to get pictures.

Can someone pass the normal pancakes, please?

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Food is ALWAYS better when presented in it's natural state...you know, on a stick.

Cake said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Cake said...

Too bad this idea didn't work out (http://www.thoughtviper.com/inexob/images/ined1.jpg) you could've had almost every meal on a stick, just as nature intended it.

Cake said...

The website is being cut off for some reason - that should have a .jpg on the end.

(Mother Nature clearly doesn't want me bringing this stuff to the attention of the blogworld.)

bostongraf said...

Friendly's Reese's Pieces Sundae

OMG. It's been years.Why has it been so long? I used to beg my parents to take me to Friendly's so that they could buy me one of these...Now I have a job. And a car!

Something must be done. Soon.

Anonymous said...

"Potato elixer sticks????" You just made my day.

And I'm totally on your team when it comes to the McDonald's milkshakes-in fact, I think the federal government should require every American citizen to drink at least one each week, even if they're on feeding tubes.