The beloved Cake sent me this story yesterday....I'll just put in the good part.
>>>>Edwardsville, Ill. (AP) -- Two students at Southern Illinois University in this St. Louis suburb kidnapped, paddled and burned a young man with freshly baked cookies after a drug deal went bad, prosecutors said. <<<<<<
I WANT TO BE PADDLED WITH FRESHY BAKED COOKIES!!!
Is that even a punishment?
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13 comments:
A cookie paddling...now that's a happy ending.
In England, you could get a biscuit paddling.
HEY! You edited out the good part.* What KIND of cookies were they?
*I'd like to see your license to edit, mister.
Sparkle: You're right! We can catch him on an *international* editing violation as well -- after all, even if he did have a U.S. editing license (which I seriously doubt), this story was sent to him by a Canadian.
What's the penalty again for editing without a license?
A COOKIE PADDLING!
No, I'm afraid he must go to the Red Penitentiary for this one. I might let him off lightly with a cookie paddling. But, it's gotta be an 100% organic buckwheat groat and tofu cookie paddling.
Tofu cookies...ewww. I had tofu cheesecake once by accident.
It was revolting.
Hey, maybe it should be a tofu cheesecake paddling instead?
Good thinkin', Lincoln! Tofu cheesecake is a deadly sin. I've seen the recipes, "In this healthy take on an old favorite, silky tofu plays a starring role. You won't miss the cream cheese, and a sumptuous bran bud crust is the perfect foil for the..."
AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEE! Ptui! Ptui!
Tofu? Bleah! That's a little harsh, isn't it? Maybe we could just pelt him with Mallomars and write him a warning.
Your dominatrix must just love you.
Dominatrix/baker...hmmm.
There could be some serious money (dough) in that, actually.
::goes off to tweak resume::
So do ya call them the Cookie Monsters?
Wicked slackah.
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