Monday, March 30, 2009

Are folks from India retarded...I mean "special"?

I love people from India.

I guess.

It's just a different culture. One I don't understand.

So maybe I hate them.

I guess.

It's just a different culture. One I don't understand.

My shop is near an Indian grocery store and folks from India walk by my shop to get to said grocery store.

And they come into my shop with their kids and buy stuff.

All good, correct?

Not exactly.

So what is wrong with folks from India shopping with me?

They tend not to shut my door.

I have a sign on the door that says : Please Close Door.

But they don't.

Even without the sign you'd think folks would just shut the door.

But they don't.

Swedish people always shut the door.

And Germans.

Folks from Pakistan shut the door.

Etc.

But usually folks from India don't.

And I don't understand it.

Must be a cultural thing.

Or maybe I should just get a self-closing door.

But I digress.

So anyhow over the weekend an Indian family went grocery shopping and left their 14 year old retarded child in front of my store.

And not retarded like an idiot.

An actual person with what folks used to call retardation.

And he was kinda swinging on the street sign and making weird retarded noises and clapping and all sorts of goofy stuff you expect from a 'special olympian'.

But of course with that annoying accent from India.

Are you still with me?

Do you have the full picture?

So now India's finest Special Olympian decides to come into my shop.

And guess what?

He comes in and shuts the door behind him.

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Unrelated added bonus because I took a week off...a picture of Hillary showing why she wore pant suits all those years.






9 comments:

Cake said...

So being retarded cancels out the India Gene? Or something?

(Hell...I'm going to hell...)

Lois Lane said...

Yeah, and....

Oh, forget it. I'll just pick up my things and walk straight to hell, because whatever I was going to say would send me there anyway.

Cake said...

If you get there first, Lois, save me a seat, eh?

Sparkle Plenty said...

To sum up: Hillary might want to look into Eddie Bauer's breezy new line of burkhas.
Naw...incomplete.
To sum up: You are good at guessing the ages of children.
Naw...incomplete.
To sum up: I'm not the only person who swings on street signs, makes weird retarded noises, claps, and all sorts of goofy stuff.
Naw...off-topic.
To sum up: You need to change your sign to say, "People of India: It is my door you are to be closing now! I am gratified for your help of great usefulness." Cheaper than a self-closing door.

-The Beatles said...

-She Came In Through The Open Front Door.

Just sayin' said...

Hillary's outfit matches Sparkle's blog.

Sparkle Plenty said...

What can I say? I'm "special." Juuuust like people say.

The Slightly Suggestive Beatles said...

Slam Me Do

Anonymous said...

OK...they walked all the way from India to go to your store and you're busting them for not shutting the door behind them? Maybe you should massage their tired Indian feet.