Monday, October 29, 2007

The Yankees Suck

The 2007 World Champion Boston Red Sox don't.


bacon ace said...

Yeah NoOprah! Who came into your store last week before the series started and flat out told you it would be a sweep? This guy right here ::points thumbs at self::

Anonymous said...

The best team in baseball this year won the World Series.

Congrats to all the Sox fans!

Enjoy A-Rod at either third or short next year...

-- Lamont "Credit Where Due" Cranston

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Dear Bacon Ace,

Who agreed with you? Oh,...that would be me.

And to be fair, it wasn't really hard to predict a sweep in this know, with The Colorado Rockies being a minor league team and all.

(I love being a bad winner)

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Dear Lamont,

Not a chance the Red Sox sign A-Rod.




Anonymous said...


Then the Red Sox are stupid.

Granted, up to now A-Rod has been a miserable failure in the post-season. That said, taking an awesome 3-4 like Ortiz and Manny and making it a 3-4-5 of Ortiz, Manny and A-Rod would yield one of the most explosive lineups in baseball history.

Furthermore, there is no telling how Ortiz's balky knee is going to play out. A-Rod in the lineup allows Francona to be a lot more generous with resting Ortiz down the stretch -- and let's face it, a lineup in which either Ortiz or Ramirez sat this year just wasn't as scary as when both of 'em were there.

Last year, A-Rod did hit into a number of double plays, and was the grand master of the meaningless home run. This year, the situation was different. It is not possible to drive in 150+ meaningless runs.

A 3-4-5 like the one I mentioned above is a Rotisserie wet dream -- and it is within the Sox's reach. Add to that A-Rod's gold glove defense at both short and third, and the greater long-term upside of his career, along with the fact that he's a right-handed power (they tend to be quite pleasing at Fenway) hitter and you've got a very, very good fit.

I don't think Boston is the top prospect for his services -- there are those who believe a deal has already been inked, with the Angels, the Dodgers and the Cubs being the leading contenders. But I don't believe A-Rod is a "cooler" (despite his nickname in Texas) and I don't think teams should take themselves out of the running for a 32-year-old future Hall of Famer.

Would you really trade the next four years of Alex Rodriguez for the next four years of Mike Lowell? Are you that sure Lowell is going to drive in 450-500 runs?

Clubhouse cancer? Much has been said about A-Rod being a selfish player, in terms of his stats and his privileges, but I have yet to see one on-the-record instance of him being a negative influence in the clubhouse.

I think he should still be a Yankee. I seriously question any team that would pass him up. The Red Sox should be doing everything short of selling the naming rights to their stadium to Derek Jeter to land him.

-- Lamont "Hot Stove Burns!" Cranston

cake said...

::sticks bubblegum on NoOprah's lucky hat::


Lois Lane said...

Yay Sox indeed!

I sent the Lois Boys to preschool this a.m. proudly wearing their Sox caps. Jak-El refused to take his off when we got into school, prompting a table full of his toddler pals (all wearing Sox shirts) to point at him and say YEAH!!!!

It's so nice to see children on the right path at such a young age.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Dearest Misguided Lamont,

Every, I repeat, EVERY World Series Winner in the history of the game has done so without A-Rod.

Is he great? Yup.

Is he a douche? Yup.

Do the Red Sox want a douche on their team? Nope.

The money that would be used for an A-rod could be used for Mike Lowell and a pitcher.

And that will win more games.

Anonymous said...

Dearest Misguided NoOprah:

Did you know you could take "Every, I repeat, EVERY World Series Winner in the history of the game has done so without A-Rod", substitute "Ted Williams" for "A-Rod", and still have a factually correct sentence?

Having A-Rod on your team vastly enhanced your chance of post-season play. As was the case with Ted Williams, in his day.

Wouldn't want to waste a draft pick on Teddy boy now, though. Even if I did have cloning rights.

-- Lamont "Rotisserie Beach Volleyball" Cranston

cake said...

Lowell! Lowell! Lowell! Lowell! Lowell! Lowell! Lowell! Lowell!

That's all I gotta say.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Dear Lamont,

We weren't talking about Ted.

Sparkle Plenty said...

Dearest Lamont and Dearest No Oprah,

Ahhhhh...the air is crackling with your Spencer Tracy/Kate Hepburn bickerson chemistry. You're both so cute when you get all feisty!


Anonymous said...


As long as NoOprah is the one in the A-line dress, you can have all the romantic fantasies about us you like.

Just don't pick Ted Williams in next year's Rotisserie baseball draft. And if you have a chance to grab A-Rod before Lowell, do so. From a statistical point of view, that is.

-- Lamont "Licorice. If There's Anything I'm A Sucker For, It's Licorice." Cranston

cake said...

Okay, Lamont, what on earth made you think that anyone needs the visual of IANO in an A-line dress?!

Thanks a lot. You'll pay for that, Yankee man. ::waves fist at NY::

Anonymous said...

Would it help if I said it could be a very masculine A-line dress?

God. Oh God. Oh God no. That doesn't help at all. Oh, God, what an image.


I... can... still... see!

-- Lamont "Hate Couture" Cranston