Tuesday, August 15, 2006

and then I'll take you to this gorgeous restaurant overlooking Boston....

So I mentioned that me and Hoag used to sell stuff at Star Trek conventions.

Here is another story because a gal from New Zealand demanded it.

We were setting up at this one show and needed to get into the dealers room early and the security wouldn't let us for some reason (it was too early? wrong day? The promoter wasn't there?)....now at these shows 'security' usually consisted of three fans with Spock ears and phasers on their waist. WE HAD TO GET IN!

Hoag initiated plan 7. (there is no plan 7...I just made that up)

Plan 7 (no such thing) is when Hoag flirts with some broad to get his way (now called Plan 7) Without getting into trade secrets it worked like a charm and she allowed us inside the room for early set up. Not only will our tables look better than anyone else's because we now have time to properly display things, but our bellies will be full because now we've had time for breakfast. And breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

So now Saturday is winding down and it's time for Hoag to pay up. (I start laughing like Peter Lorre.) This 6' 5" 'security' broad dressed in full Battlestar Galactica regalia shows up at our table expecting Hoag to take her out to dinner at this revolving restaurant overlooking Boston. She thinks she looks hot. (Peter Lorre laugh) She doesn't even for a nano second look hot. And she's pretty dang boring also.

Now if you know Hoag you know there is not even a remote chance that he takes out a 6' 5" boring gal dressed in Battlestar Galactica clothes. So he tells her something about having some emergency at the hospital (Dr. Hoag) but he'll give her a free 8 X 10 glossy photo of Dirk Benedict* tomorrow when she comes by our table ...and surprise surprise....she was just has happy.

Moral of the story:

Never go on date with a chick dressed like someone from Battlestar Galactica (unless she looks like that hot blond in the new Battlestar Galactica and is dressed like her)

Second moral of the story:
Star Trek is WAY cool next to Battlestar Galactica.

(* Dirk Benedict starred in Battlestar Galactica and had dreamy good looks.....though not as dreamy as William Shatner circa 1967)

13 comments:

Cake said...

Oh, that Hoagy!

Clinky said...

The Faceman!

Anonymous said...

I think Hoagy is a sensitive, articulate gentlemen with a deep respect for women.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

She was dressed as a chick from Battlestar Galactica. He did what any man would do.

He lied.

Lois Lane said...

But it's still cool to dress as Maya from "Space 1999," right? I need to know soon--have an important business meeting coming up and don't want to look unprofessional.

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm, Shatner is nice.... but not as dreamy looking as JFK (before half his head was missing, of course)

Cake said...

Lois:

Oh, absolutely. You'll definitely be the coolest gal there. Be sure to take pictures!

(What? No...I'd never lie to you...)

Lois Lane said...

Ms. Cake:

Phew! Thanks! I was worried I'd look like a dork or something.

Cake said...

Anytime, I'm totally there for you. And remember, if anyone looks at you oddly? They're only jealous.

Anonymous said...

I hear the chicks are hotter at car conventions.
Maybe YOU should start a new business so Hoagy can accompany you on conventions and flirt with gals who aren't dressed like space creatures.
Just a suggestion.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

He's married now. He no longer flirts.

Anonymous said...

There is no Hoagy. You made him up.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I forgot he doesn't flirt anymore because he's married. Silly me. What could I have been thinking?