So last night I'm kneeling down to say goodnight to my puppy and I'm pattin' her head and scratchin' behind her ears and stuff.
And when I get up I notice my zipper was down so I zipped it back up.
Right about then Wifey says to me in horror:
"Was she licking you!!???"
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18 comments:
Well, was she?
Ixnay on the eanutpay utterbay.
Hang on...
A tip for you:
If not then you need to smear on a different brand of dog food. That should do it.
Okay, well at least we now know why IANO thinks his puppy is the best.
And let us never speak of this again.
I's loves me some sheep.
JED! Y'all told me yed stopped visitationing the sheeps! Goldarn it, man, yah know I's ain't competin' with no ewwwwe. Y'all be sleepin' in the truck come nighttime and see if ya don't.
What if the Beatles sang about bestiality?
-Back in the D.O.G.G.Y.
-Love me Rover
-Mean Mr. Animal Warden
-Happiness is a Warm Greyhound
The Long and Winding Dog Hole (or something)
- We All Live For a Yellow Labrador
- He Came in Through...
No, I just can't do this, never mind.
::goes to take a shower::
(Well, a mental shower, anyways, since I'm at work and they would frown at me showering in my office...I think.)
yuck.
I Wanna Lick Your "Hand"
Happiness Is A Warm Tongue
Lick It To Ride
The Drool On The "Hill"
No Oprah has a puppy!
What is his name?
Where did he get the puppy?
Her name is Lily and he got her from Mexico.
Unless of course, Wifey finished her statement by saying, ''cause that's our thing.'' As she attempted to hide the jar of peanut butter she was carrying.
Cake beat me to it.
I was going to say absolutely, positively, that NoOprah's puppy was the best.
And I still do, for I have the ring of objectivity around me.
No, wait, that's just ringworm...
-- Lamont "Canine Distemper" Cranston
It figures that a post about bestiality would bring out someone called "madaboutdogs."
What?
Oh.
Umm, sorry maddog!
Leave My Kitten Alone (Needs no modification)
Martha My Dear (Needs no modification)
Baby's in Bark
Ballad of John and Barko
Dog a Pony
And Your Breed Can Sing
Helter Shelter
Being for the Benefit of Mr. Bite
I Saw Her Scratching There
When I'm 13 (In Dog Years, That's 64)
Norwegian Woof (Mmm, Swedish Erodoga!)
I've Just Sniffed a Faeces
You Really Got a Bite On Me
Hey Bulldy- er, dog
Pleasing Mr. Postman (Can go here, can go under "What If The Beatles Sang About Porn?" In fact, so can "The Continuing Sodomy of Bungalow Bill." Whee!)
-- Lamont "And I'm Available for Pet-Sitting, Too!" Cranston
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