Feeling cranky? Just feel like making some trouble?
Here are some surefire ways:
1) Insist to whoever will listen that E.T. followed a trail of M&Ms. Never admit you're wrong.
2) Insist that Lee Meriwether played the role of Catwoman in the 1966 Batman TV show.
3) Tell someone that if George Bush could only get one more term he'd turn things around.
4) Tell a comic fan that Stan Lee actually did all the drawings but let Jack Kirby sign his name to them. (this one is actually true)
5) Tell a Red Sox fan that the Yankees do not in fact suck. They're just misunderstood. And frail. Possibly gay.....Hmmmmm....maybe that wouldn't start a fight.
6) Tell someone that there is actually something for #6 but it involves their ever expanding waistline and it wouldn't be polite to discuss it.
7) Don't go to Cousin Saul's Saturday event because there is something good on TV....ummmmm....I mean because I have surgery scheduled.
8) Or something.
9) Talk to any of my Mother's sisters. They'll say something. I'm sure of it.
10) Ride a Segway.