So one night, a little while ago, I'm standing in the kitchen with Wifey just going over our days and making small talk when all of a sudden she says:
"Would you like Sally?"
Would I like Sally? Wow!
For those of you that don't know, Sally is a hot chick in the neighborhood...good friend of Wifey, blonde, thin, sexy, and all around fun. She speaks with a British accent.
Would I like Sally?
I was surprised Wifey was asking this. My birthday was coming up...so was our anniversary.
Was this some kinda pre-arranged present?
Was this a swinger thing? Was Wifey planning on doing something with The Sally Hubby?
Was this going to be a one night stand? Would my friendship with Sally and Hubby (and Wifey) remain intact after I slept with her?
What were Sally's thoughts on this?
Was she the one that brought it up?
I did a pros and cons list:
PROS: I would have 2-15 minutes of great sex.
CONS: It could destroy my marriage. Cost me half my net worth. Turn my kids against me.
It sounded like a good idea.
I was gonna be a swinger!
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WIFEY: "Hello....hello....hello...."
ME: "Huh?"
WIFEY: "I asked you a question."
ME: "What?"
WIFEY: "Would you like salad?"
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Why the hell would I want to sleep with salad??
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10 comments:
Lettuce see here...clearly you have the giant onions to think you can pepper your blog with saladacious stories like this and not expect to get a-salted with yet more puns.
I'm just tossing this out there. I don't wanna be a crouton...I mean, cretin...but I really think you have it coming to you.
(I was dying to fit 'cucumber' in but I just can't figure out how.)
"fit cucumber in"
Was this deliberate!? *leer*
>>>>(I was dying to fit 'cucumber' in but I just can't figure out how.)<<<<<
I hope a gal wrote this and not a guy.
Wifey gonna toss yer salad.
Your readers demand a Red Sox Beatles game to usher in tonight's big game! Demand!
Yeah!
What sh-- uh...they said!
What kind of dressing would you pour on Sallie?
Bacon Ace:
My vote would be for Raspberry Vinaigrette...it goes with almost everything.
(Even bacon!)
I'd say you toss Sally some bacon and lettuce so she'd be dressing for dinner.
need Beatles version of last night STAT.
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