Monday, September 04, 2006

A swift and strong response

George W. Bush has sworn to apply a swift and strong response to North Korea (or Iran) for the untimely death of Steve 'Crocodile Hunter'Irwin.

Bush also stated that America will not bow down from the killing of any of our reptile hunters. America will not be held hostage to this kind of terrorist activity.

From now to eternity this day will be known as 9/4.

Godspeed Croc Hunter!

30 comments:

I Ain't No Oprah said...

And we have a winner from our deadpool from back in April.

A lovely gal named Ann picked Steve 'Croc Hunter'Irwin to die.

Good work Ann!! You prize is slithering it's way to your home as we speak...

And she even got the bonus points because of Steve's tragic demise.

KUDOS!

cake said...

It scares me that the terrorists have stingrays on their side now.

Next they'll be putting strappin' frickin' laser beams to their heads...

Bemisdown said...

I think I read somewhere that the stingray was actually a North Korean spy.

Should you start up a new dead pool now nooprah? And do you pick the nominees?

I Ain't No Oprah said...

New DeadPool will have to start Wednesday (Tuesday is ALL Katie Couric ALL DAY LONG)

In fact all blogs have been instructed to write nothing except Katie Couric stuff.

Mary Jo said...

Please let the next Deadpool death be Ted Kennedy...PLEASE!!!

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Ted won't get you the bonus points because of his age...

cake said...

I didn't get the memo about Katie Couric blogging.

Phew.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

MEMO:

Tomorrow is blog about Katie Couric Day

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Hoag thinks all the animals got together and hired the Animal Mob to kill Steve Irwin.

The Sopranimals.

Bemisdown said...

Are the Sopranimals STILL pissed about the horse's head?

cake said...

NoOprah:

Who's Katie Couric, anyways?

Sincerely,

Largely* Oblivious

*(That's a comment on my mental state, not my size.)

Bemisdown said...

Cake:

Katie Couric: Perky and vastly overpaid morning talk show host who is about to become a nonperky and vastly overpaid nightly news anchor.
The media's acting like she found a cure for cancer or something, while I haven't met a SINGLE person who

a. Gives a shit
b. Has ever even MENTIONED Katie Couric. Ever.

Clinky said...

If we don't fight the stingrays there, they'll follow us home...

I Ain't No Oprah said...

"Take a man swimming and he'll have fun for a day....teach a man to swim and he'll die a horrible death at the hands of stingrays"

cake said...

Foolish NoOprah, stingrays don't have hands.

Forget curing cancer, I heard Katie Couric once fought off a whole school of stingrays...

cake said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
I Ain't No Oprah said...

If Stingrays don't have hands, then only the outlaws will have guns.

Whip Inflation Now, Just Say No, and Leave No Child Behind.

Bemisdown said...

That's just a Katie Couric Myth-it's been kicking around forever.

Maybe if we treated the stingrays like pets-gave them treats, had special stockings made for them at Christmas (unless they're Jewish Stingrays-I'll let nooprah combine those two words), brought them for swims in the local ponds, then maybe they wouldn't pierce holes in our hearts.

Just a thought. I'm simply thinking of ways to maintain peace between Man and Stingray.

cake said...

Good point, Bemisdown. Maybe Bush should try and sweet-talk the stingrays, get them over on his side...how about "No Stingrays Left Behind"?

I Ain't No Oprah said...

I love that Katie's first broadcast will somehow have to mention Stingrays.

And that WICKED stupid thing that's gonna happen about an hour or two before her scripted debut.

cake said...

"And that WICKED stupid thing that's gonna happen about an hour or two before her scripted debut."

Bush's announcement of his "No Stingray Left Behind" program??

bacon ace said...

So here's how I woke up this morning:

Mrs. bacon ace: "Steve Erwin the Crocodile Hunter was killed this morning. He was stung by a stingray and the stinger went under his ribcage and pierced his heart"

bacon ace: "Bwahahahaha"

Mrs. bacon ace: "That's not very nice, he was a human being" (or something to that effect becauee I'm a horrible human being)

So that's how I was woken up today; to scolding. Happy Labor Day everyone, die doing your jobs.

P.S. If you're hunting crocodiles (fresh water critters) and you run into stingrays (which are salt water critters) you're way of base and probably weren't a good crocodile hunter anyway.

P.P.S. How does your heart get pierced by a Corvette?

SaltWater Crocodile said...

Bacon Ace eats corn the long way

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Saltwater Crocs?

CRIKES!

freshwater stingray said...

I have a whole pan of bacon cooking...stop by anytime you like, Bacon Ace.

Bemisdown said...

Nooprah-

This tragedy, as much as its affected you, did NOT suddenly turn you into an Australian.

CRIKES!!!!

cake said...

Bemisdown:

It's okay, he hasn't said "G'day, mate!" yet. I think we're still safe.

Bemisdown said...

Cake,

You're right. And since tomorrow is officially Katie Couric Day, then we'll just assume Nooprah will be over the whole "Australian" thing. Let's think of it as a phase.

Clinky said...

On Tuesday, I will reluctantly feature Miss Katie Couric.

Ann said...

I WON!!!