Saturday, November 29, 2008

Who doesn't love a good old fashioned human stampede?

So yesterday, on Black Friday, tons of rampaging stampeding yahoos stormed through a Wal-Mart (Hell-Mart) and proceeded to kill a guy.

Sounds bad, correct?

But wouldn't you say the following bargains were worth the death of one temporary Wal-Mart clerk?

//////Items on sale at the Valley Stream Wal-Mart included a Samsung 50-inch Plasma HDTV for $798, a Bissel Compact Upright Vacuum for $28, a Samsung 10.2 megapixel digital camera for $69 and DVDs such as "The Incredible Hulk" for $9.//////

I mean let's get real for a second....The Incredible Hulk DVD for only nine dollars??

$9.00 Hulk DVD=Death.


It's crap said...

Was it the Ang Lee Hulk dvd?

Because that would make the story truly tragic.

sy-phillis said...

You can't say "Black Friday" anymore. It's now a hate-crime."

naacp said...


Someone beat you to that joke yesterday. We buried them.

cake said...

I wish it'd been shoppers that were trampled...hello, Darwin Award winners!

god said...

What is a Darwin award?

Darwin said...

Dear God:

Quit monkeying around!


god said...

I know who Darwin IS, but I just don't know what they award is.

Anonymous said...

Prolly some sci-fi freak award.

Darwin said...

Dear God:

It's an award given out every year to folks who do the world a favour by removing themselves from the gene pool.

For Your Honour's illumination:


Darwin said...

Dear Anonymous:

Here, just have a look at this gun for me? It doesn't seem to want to, have a look down the barrel...I think it's just jammed or something.

::plugs ears::

mulderjoe said...

Jesus loves you. He doesn't love Darwin or Wal-mart employees, though.

Bargain Beatles said...

- All You Need Is Boots
- Stomp Stomp Me Do
- Stampede and Shout
- Happiness is a Cheap TV
- Bargains in the Aisle with Bodies

God said...

I don't believe in Darwin.

Darwin said...

Dear God:

I guess turnaround is fair play.

God said...

Yep. Wanna go get a beer? I'm buying.

Darwin said...

Sure. Meet ya at the place around the corner in 10 minutes.

And can we agree on no angels and no monkeys?

God said...