Friday, November 14, 2008
James Bond, Armenia
Well, the new James Bond movie opens today. It's called Quantum of Solace and is from a short story Ian Fleming wrote.
(Don't you hate when your solace is measured in quantums?)
But it's kinda of a stupid title for a movie and the producers have used up all of the original Bond titles. So of course it's up to us, yes us, to come up with titles for future James Bond movies. (I think we've done this before)
And now before I even begin I'm bored with the project.
So maybe I'll just complain about American Express.
Years ago when I started my business I wanted to accept American Express in my shop and these pompous assholes wanted to charge me crazy fees to have the 'privilege' of taking their 'prestigious' cards.
And then they gave out Gold Cards and Platinum Cards and made people feel important.
But you want to know something? It was just a stupid credit card and nobody was EVER impressed. EVER!
I never accepted their stupid card in my little shop. For decades I haven't.
And every so often someone will take out their American Express card and I tell them "Sorry, we don't accept that card." (and it feels real good)
So the people just put it away and take out a Visa card.
Do you know why?
Because people with American Express cards also carry Visa Cards.
Point of the story?
American Express is near broke and is begging the USA for a bailout! HA! FUCK YOU AMERICAN EXPRESS YOU SON OF A BITCH LOSER CARD COMPANY!! DRY UP AND GO AWAY!!!
It took 25 years but I won!! YOU STINKING LOSER!!!
BOND TITLES FOR AMERICAN EXPRESS:
Die And Let Die.
GOLD CARD ::gives it the finger::
FROM AMERICAN EXPRESS WITH HATE
Visa Cards are Forever
The Man With The Gold Card (snicker)
The Spy Who Hated American Express
Quantum of SoLittleCash (because you mismanaged your company Mr. Express!)
You Were Only Late Twice (but we canceled you anyhow!)
Cashino (We Screwed Up) Royale
So To Further Sum Up: